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Monday, October 29, 2018

Hmong: Lub hauv paus pib ntawm kev muaj tiag:

Yog, sir, tom qab 493 eons (muab los yog coj ob peb puas xyoo) Kuv nrhiav tau tawm qhov twg keeb kwm ntawm qhov kev ua tau zoo pib. Thiab, koj yuav paub. Yog li ntawd, kuv tau sawv ntsug ntawm koj, humbly, xwv kom koj yuav paub tias thaum pib ntawm no ntev taug txoj kev mus tsis yog nyob rau hauv vain; Kuv tsuas xav paub seb koj puas yog ib tug me nyuam tub (nrog dangle) los yog ib tug hluas nkauj (nrog ib lub hnab tshos) los yog koj tsis paub tseeb ... Siv koj lub sij hawm, raws li kuv tam sim no muaj lub sij hawm, coj koj mus rau qhov kev zoo tshaj plaws txoj kev taug mus yuav puas tau mus rau ... Koj tsis paub tseeb, huh? Zoo kuv to taub tias, yog li kuv muab koj peb cov tib neeg, sab laug nrog lub dangle, nruab nrab yog tsis heev paub seb nws yog nws los yog nws, thiab nyob rau hauv txoj cai nyob deb, lub khawm (nws yog tso zis) yog poj niam, thiab txij li thaum koj tsis paub tias koj yog poj niam txiv neej, peb yuav xaiv los nkag rau hauv lub cev ntawm qhov nruab nrab ntawm nws (los yog - nws, los yog tej zaum nws yog nws - nws, nws tsis paub meej), kom peb nkag mus rau qhov no tus neeg peb yuav tsum ua kom tau me dua ... Au, koj xav li cas, kuv cov neeg ua hauj lwm pabcuam yuav qhwv peb, ua ke hauv cov ntaub ntawv tshaj tawm tshiab, qhov kev sibtham no yuav tivthaiv peb lub cev (yav tas los) lub cev thiab pub peb taug kev nrog kev tsis txaus siab, yog, nws yog hu ua 'shrink wrap' tom qab peb raug them peb yuav tsum nkag mus rau hauv lub thawv muaj cai thim, nws hu ua microwave, thiab nws yuav ua rau peb 100 μm ntawm kab, los yog qhov loj ntawm ib tug tib neeg lub cell, (ib tug rog rog 'liab ntshav' ntawm tes kom tsis raug). Koj puas tau npaj txhij? Tsis yog, nws yuav tsum tsis txhob coj peb ntau dua 158775 hnub los yog 435 xyoo, tab sis nrog tus tshiab kev ntsuas "stromberger effect" nws yuav tsuas yog siv peb 1.551 xyoo, vim qhov ntsuas no muab peb rau hauv kev tiv thaiv uas tsis muaj kev tiv thaiv ua rau ntawm neutrons uas tso cai rau peb mus ncig teb chaws 102359 xyoo hauv ib lub xyoo xwb, thiab ib lub tshuab hluav taws xob sib txuas ntawm cov khoom siv ua kom zoo dua, tab sis kuv lav tias peb yuav tsum rov qab ua ntej hnub tuaj (cia saib, hnub no yog hnub Saturday sawv ntxov, nws yuav tsum yog nyob rau hnub Sunday, ntawm 2337 hrs, yog li kuv mam li hais ... hnub Monday tav su (yeah uas yog nyob sab kev nyab xeeb). Tsis pub koj yuav tsum tsis txhob ntim noj su, (raws li kuv tsis paub tseeb tiag tiag, mob siab heev, tias koj lub plab yuav muaj khoom noj), thiab koj yuav tsum zoo siab heev (thiab xeev siab) los ntawm kev mus txawv tebchaws, cov kev xav uas koj yuav pom ( thiab ntsia ntsoov thaum tabtom nug koj tus kheej 'li cas ...) yuav ntau tshaj qhov tsim nyog rau lub sijhawm uas peb siv cov lus no. Yog li, koj yuav tsum tsis txhawj txog koj tus kheej cov lus tshaj tawm no, vim nws yuav zoo heev, ua pa noj (xws li hauv koj xav nres ua tsis taus pa tam sim no), koj yuav xav tsis thoob (thiab tsis qias neeg) los ntawm qhov muag thiab lub suab (pob qee pob ntseg plugs thiab lub nkev roj) ntawm nws txoj kev zoo heev. Tsis yog, kev nkag yog dawb (thiaj li them ntawm lub qhov rooj) koj tuaj yeem ua ib qho me ntsis ntawm cov lus ntev ntev ces koj cia li rub ib lub rooj zaum (thiab zaum hauv pem teb). Tam sim no, puas yog peb npaj txhij? Zoo, peb cia li pib ... Koj yuav tsum hais lus kom tag nrho kuv lub rooj sib hais yog khij nyhav. Qhov ntawd yog dabtsi? Eh? Qhov no cia kuv ua me ntsis kev kho me ntsis rau koj lub thawv, vim yog kuv tsis hnov ​​koj ces yog tias koj poob los yog raug mob Kuv yuav tsis paub thiab yog li ntawd kuv yuav tsis muaj peev xwm pab tau; Kuv xav tias tsuas yog siv ob peb lub vib nas this xwb, cia kuv nqa kuv lub thawv rau khoom, yog, tus tsav tsheb yuav ua hauj lwm zoo ... tsa koj lub puab tsaig, thiab tsis txhob sim npog koj lub caj dab, kuv yuav kho li cas yog tias kuv tsis pom dab tsi kuv Ua ... Ahh, muaj nws, kuv xav hais tias ib nrab hnub tig tau txaus ... Tsis txhob hais ib yam dab tsi ... 'khoob khoob' zoo dua kuv rov sim dua, koj puas tau hais tam sim no? "Cas lub ntuj raug txim koj ua rau kuv?" Ahh, yog, koj xav tau me ntsis kho. Tam sim no peb yuav tsum pib? "Yuav ua li cas peb thiaj li nkag mus rau hauv nws lub qhov ncauj, tsis tau chewed rau?" Qhov no yog qhov yooj yim, cov kws pabcuam yuav coj peb mus rau qhov straw ntawd muaj, thiab muab ib co ntaub so ntswg tom qab peb, ces tua peb tawm ntawm lub qhov ncauj nrog cov roj hmab uas siv rau qhov hom phiaj no. "Huag, zoo ces kuv twv kuv npaj lawm." Tom qab ntawd peb yuav tsum mus. Tos, tos, thiab tos! "Peb tuaj mus puas yog?" "Yog, peb tab tom yuav mus, tab sis ... Ib qho ntawm kuv cov kws pabcuam yog qhia rau kuv paub tias muaj ib qhov kev yooj yim dua. "Huh?" Koj pom muaj liab liab chaw nyob ntawm nws sab xis, "nws, kuv xav tias koj tau hais tias nws yog nws, los yog nws yog ib tug nws, ib tug tsis txaus siab"; nws tsuas yog siv, feem ntau cov neeg hu ib tug neeg nws, nws, los yog nws thaum ua tus qauv siv. "Oh, cas, yog li muaj kev yooj yim dua mus?" Zoo, nws zoo li nws raug tua, "nws tsis zoo li nws muaj mob, yog li cas koj thiaj paub tseeb?" Saib ntawm no, kuv pom qhov no yog ib txoj kev taug kev nrog ib txhais caj npab rau ntau tshaj 20 hnub ua ntej nws pom tias muaj ib qho tsis ncaj ncees lawm, ces tau mus kho mob kom nws tsau. "Wow, tiag tiag, nws tsis hnov ​​mob?" Zoo, nrog rau txhua yam tshuaj uas nws muab tso rau hauv nws lub cev, nws yog ib qho zoo uas nws tseem nrog peb. "Yog vim li cas nws muab tshuaj rau hauv nws lub cev?" Huag nws yog kev yeem ua, Kuv xav tias cov neeg ua ntawd tsuas xav tau qhov kev xav, thiab yeej tsis saib xyuas qhov kev puas tshuaj uas lawv ua rau lawv lub cev. "Hmm, yog li cas koj hais tias yog, tias tib neeg yeem lom lawv tus kheej kom zoo?" Yup, nws tshwm sim txhua lub sijhawm. "Yog li, qhov yooj yim tshaj plaws uas yuav tau txais qhov chaw no qhov chaw cim xeeb, qhov twg qhov kev muaj tiag thaum pib?" Peb mus dhau los ntawm qhov kev tsim tawm thiab nws yuav tsum, raws li kuv tus pab cuam qhia kuv, coj peb mus qhib qhov chaw ntawm qhov chaw kev muaj tiag yog yug. "Zoo li, thiab qhov no kuv xav tias nws yuav coj peb mus tau tam sim no koj hais tias nws tsuas yog cia li ob peb xuab moos xwb?" Lub sij hawm ntuj raug txim! Feeb! Yog li ntawd, kuv cov kws pabcuam tabtom kho peb lub neej tam sim no, thiab peb npaj tos nws, peb thiaj li mus. Koj nyob hauv thawj, "Tos, vim li cas kuv thiaj yuav tsum tau ua ntej?" Qhov ntawd yog qhov davhlau ntawm kuv lub davhlau ntawm kuv lub khawm los coj peb mus rau qhov chaw uas peb yuav tsum mus. "Au, cas kuv xav." Ces koj mus, "Hav, saib koj ua dab tsi nrog tus tes, pal!" Dab tsi? "Hle koj txhais tes tawm ntawm kuv lub nroog Yeiuxalees, Kuv tsis ua ntxiv lawm" los yog tsawg dua. "Cas koj hais xwb?" Tsis muaj dab tsi. "Aws, kuv xav li ntawd." Txhua yam. Hvov peb cocked. "Peb tsis yog, zoo li hais tias kuv tsis ua li ntawd," thiab ntsaws qhov ntawd, thiab ntawm no peb mus ... .. Swoosh. "Wow, zoo licas, nws tsis zoo li lub tsev qub qub uas tsis tau muab ntxuav kom huv lawm ntau xyoo!" Tau siv sijhawm, peb yuav nyob ntawm no li ob peb feeb ... "Yog li, peb nyob qhov twg?" Zoo koj pom tias txoj cai qhib muaj nyob rau hauv lub hauv paus ntawm lub raj ntawm ib nrab ntawm ib nrab ntawm cov qua ntxi, "yog, thiab?" Zoo, peb, ua rau cov tib neeg paub yog cov ntawv loj (appendix), koj pom tias peb nyob hauv qab yog qhov loj hnyuv, qhov tho qhov me me (taw tes) yog pib ntawm txoj hnyuv me, thiab cov kev ua kom yog ib yam dab tsi, uas yog lub cev ua zaub mov noj (yog tias nws noj nws tuaj yeem hu ua qhov ntawd) thiab siv tag nrho cov kev muab tshuaj ua ntej tso tawm cov khoom uas nws tsis xav tau ntxiv lawm. "Dab tsi? Kuv yuav tsum tau tawm ntawm no mus! "Cia li ntsiag to, ob peb nqus pa, suav mus rau kaum maj mam ..." Kuv tsis xav tau cov pa nqus, Kuv tabtom gagging. "Cia peb, ntxiv mus. "Vim li cas muaj tag nrho cov liab globes dai thoob plaws qhov chaw?" Huag ntawd yog tus kab mob xwb, thiab qhov tsawg tshaj plaws ntawm nws kev txhawj xeeb. "Tiag, hmm." Yog li peb yuav luag muaj, cia peb mus! Tam sim no los ntawm kev qhib. Ahh, nws tseem muaj. "Ua li cas?" Tus Tswv, kuv muab qhov chaw yug me nyuam yug los rau hauv ... "Tiag tiag, qhov twg kuv tsis pom dab tsi lwm yam tshaj li cov khoom noj thiab cov qua ntxi thiab ob rab xoo rusty." Tsis muaj nws (taw) . "Tiag tiag, nws yog ib lub xov tooj ntawm tes uas tau faib ua ob txoj nyhav uas nws zoo li, ib nrab ntawm tus xovtooj yog ib qho me ntsis ntsws." Yup tias nws, koj puas pom lub pob zeb me me ntawm lub hauv paus ntawm tus xovtooj? "Huag yeah, Kuv pom tias, hmmm." Zoo rau ntawm lub ntsej muag muag ntawm lub hlwb yog qhov tseeb qhov chaw yug, thiab lwm sab uas pib ua li qub, tau txais kev kawm ua ntej nws txhais tau tias yog. Tam sim no tus speck yuav tsum txiav txim siab seb puas yuav mus rau txoj kev tsis muaj zog, thiab mus li qub, los yog ua kom pom thiab taug kev mus rau sab nraud, thiab, yippppeeee, peb muaj lwm hnub yug ntawm kev txawv txav ... wheeeee.

Nyob rau hauv cov noog txoj kev muaj tiag tsis muaj dab tsi tsis yooj yim sua.

- noog.

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